Sometimes you can surprise yourself

And sometimes others can surprise you even more.

As aforementioned, I met up with The Ex for coffee last night. And I was surprised to find myself getting really nervous as the clock got closer to 9:30. What would we talk about? Will I start bawling out of nowhere? What should I wear?

We had only very recently started talking again after a six month self-imposed embargo of sorts. I found it so odd that the idea of seeing him again made me so scared. I mean, this man held my heart for three years. Not long ago, he was the most familiar and most comfortable person in my life. And now, I'm worried about what impression I'll make?

Funny what time and distance and a few select words can do.

I was able to smack myself out of that mindset. I realize that we ended as amiably as possible and that while I may not be over him, I am over the hurt. No reason in the world to stress. It's just him.

Buuuttttt..... He did dump me, so I figured I was entitled to a slight bit of  woman-scorned revenge in fashion form. They say the best revenge is living well.
Well, I say the best revenge is looking good. So, I went sophistikill on him.

Now, sophistikill is less of an outfit and more of an overall vibe. Tight pencil skirts, monochromatic with color pops, stockings and a wrist-watch are vital. It says " I am unflappable." It also says "Don't fuck with your secretary."

Surprise! The night went so nicely. We caught up on each other's work, families and general well-being. We briefly touched on our relationship and were able to make some easements and amends without dredging up the whole past. I realize how silly it was for me to be nervous over him. We always were very easy with each other. When we talked, we could talk about anything. Turns out as much as I miss him romantically, I miss him platonically even more. The Ex said something during our breakup that I'm finally coming to realize is true now.

Much as it kills me, we really are better at being friends.