I'm not sure why but lately, I'm just striking out left and right with folks.
Yesterday, traffic was especially bad on the way home from work so I stopped in Golden Hill to wait it out. The coffee shop was unusually vacant of any friends (which was fine by me. I had some serious crosswarding to do)
However, PN stopped by for a bit and we had a chat. A really very awkward and confusing chat. He just seemed so uncomfortable and like he couldn't wait to leave. He didn't sit down, rather hovered a few chairs away and avoided eye contact. We're not very familiar with each other but we've always been friendly and had enough to talk about in the past.
Maybe it was just an off day for him.
But sometimes I feel like people have nothing to say to me. Am I really that disengaging?
And then today, I found out that I hurt a friend with a situation I'd thought was over. Only the thing is, I've never really thought of them as a friend, just someone I'm familiar with through others. I don't know how to feel about all this. I didn't mean any ill will towards them, honestly they didn't factor into my thinking at all.
I'm never happy when someone is hurt or offended by my actions. But I'm really having a hard time feeling bad for it.
Ka.
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